YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
Randomize
