I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
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