Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
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