i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
Dude someone changed all the contacts in my phone to I Like Eggs
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
