Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
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