WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
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