What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Randomize