4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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