You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
Randomize