is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
Randomize
