Its about making memories worth repressing
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Randomize
