Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
Randomize
