drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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