now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
Randomize
