so that wasnt chicken after all
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
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