My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
How's work?
Spinning.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
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