I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
Randomize
