i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
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