I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
Randomize