Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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