is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
Randomize
