I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
Randomize
