She's JV to your varsity
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
