Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
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