Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
Randomize
