I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
Randomize
