Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
