He is such a slut. More and more my type.
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
I walked into the bathroom and there's this 6'5" cop washing his hands. He looks at me and goes, "Heard you singing outside. Sound real pretty."
No more tequila EVER.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
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