is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
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