Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
Is it weird I updated my facebook status from my phone while I had explosive diarrhea in my boss's private bathroom?
That would be awkward if he commented on your status
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
I don't get promposals. When I asked my date I was so drunk I couldn't lift my head. Then I puked on my lawn after he said "ok whatever". That's romance
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Randomize
