there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
Randomize
