Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
Randomize
