Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
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