K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
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