my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Did I show you my penis last night?
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
Randomize
