Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
Randomize
