People with herpes should wear stickers.
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
Randomize