Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
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