Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
Randomize
