What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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