I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
Quick, to the slutcave!
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
Randomize
