The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
