The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
Randomize
