problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
You sending me our unborn, unfertilized babies' names is not what I envisioned when you said you'd "drunk text me later".
Randomize
