Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
Randomize
