I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
I need moral support for this bender
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
Randomize
