the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Randomize
