I'm drive I can fine osifer
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
Randomize
