this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize