Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
Randomize
