Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
Randomize
